my dad and I are the exact same person. well, except for the fact that I admit when I'm being a dick, and he claims ignorance.

I think that's why I can't look at him without wanting to punch him in the GOD DAMN MOTHER FUCKING FACE.


he's a dick. He does shit with an impish awful glee that he knows will make me hate him.

If your mother was in the hospital for pneumonia or how the fuck ever you spell it, you think you'd let your kids know so they could visit her, right? And if you lived in bizarro world and somehow inexplicably forgot to tell your kids about your ill grandmother, you DEFINITELY wouldn't then lord it over their heads that we didn't visit her in the hospital, right? Right? Then, even more awfully, you wouldn't take this time to bitch that we (the kids) only talk to you once every three months right?


I realize that I have serious unresolved hatred towards my old man, and absolutely zero desire to repair the bridge because he acts like a fucking toddler. a holier than thou toddler.


i really should post when i'm not irate. I promise, I'm actually a pretty smiles and sunshine kind of guy.

. 12-14-12 15:24
fuck everything.

this world gets uglier every fucking day.
hope all of the Elowelians (elowelites? eloweligans?) in the portland area are all ok.

shitty news is always shitty.

Oh hey everyone! I haven't forgotten about anyone, pinky swear. I just lurk like the creeper I am.

I'm super excited that Elowel has been saved from the clutches of the dutch (? sounds right) robot apocalypse.

I really don't have much to update on. I've been listening to bichin' tunes with rad folks. Smiling.

Need ideas on what to read next. I have Junot Diaz's new book of short stories but I don't want to cry constantly for the next week. I haven't gone through Charles Burns' Black Hole in a while. That was really entertaining/terrifying.

Suggestions? Maybe I'll read 1Q84 again. That was a fun read.

I hope everyone is well.

blah. 10-08-12 22:21
I'm terrible at making decisions.

I need to get over this shit.

But seriously, I should be really happy. Things are going pretty well for me lately.

this fake smile is exhausting.

Asshole racist at work thinks i'm his friend and that gives him a free pass to say whatever wild shit comes in to his head. I have an unbelievable urge to punch him as hard as I can pretty much every time I see him. I actually fucked up my knuckle wailing on my boxing bag after work I was so furious. He's one of those types who thinks he's always the smartest person in the room. So, at work I'm reading malcolm x's biography for the millionth time and he sees the cover.

"Pfft, what do you know about malcolm x? You're not even black! You're not allowed to read that book."

Excuse me mother fucker? first off, on what planet did you think you could say something like that to a person you've said maybe 30 words to? how you walked out of work with the same amount of teeth you walked in with still blows my mind.

I'm sorry, I thought I was ready to talk about this. I'm not. I shouldn't get myself riled up before I try and sleep.

new rule, don't box when you're blindly furious.

also, next time someone says something out of line to me, I'm going to react appropriately. And by appropriately, I mean by being the caustic and vindictive asshole that I'm struggling to repress. I don't even give a fuck if I lose my job. I won't tolerate this any longer.

this was really dumb to think about before I lie down.

slowly recovering from feeling ill friday. I saw looper today. I was entertained.

? 09-28-12 14:21
Am I missing a joke with the sudden influx of new members?
ugh. 09-25-12 15:19
Trying really hard to act like I don't give a shit about the football game last night.

that is all.
08-12-12 05:47
certain I saw blahblahblah at maha yesterday. I mean, it had to be him.

I almost yelled something, then I realized I was wasted and knew nothing about him except for the name of his online persona. It probably would have been serial killer levels of weird. Also, I was wildly drunk.

so much fun. I will say that I post more about the show later, but I know I won't.

oh yeah. 08-07-12 15:45
I was worried for nothing. The rehearsal dinner/wedding/reception was fine.

Sam looked like a girl! It was weird.

Everything was really great. Except for the fact that I got super wasted and probably made an ass of myself multiple times. That's pretty much to be expected though. It was great to see old friends that I haven't seen in such a long time.

I'll probably go in to further detail, but the key is that I was a complete asshole for not trusting Sam from the get-go. She's never fucked me over... why would she have started now?

bleh. 07-28-12 17:56
I wish it wasn't so absurdly difficult to find a bike that fits me.

Am I really all that short? According to the salesperson at the bike shop, (who was completely helpful and not at all condescending) yes. Yes I am.

fuck me, right?


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